Public service announcement to Leaf fans: BREATHE. Everything will be okay.
No matter how necessary it is, – and it’s extremely necessary in the case of the Toronto Maple Leafs – watching your beloved team get partly demolished before your eyes is well, not exactly what anyone would deem “fun”. Dion Phaneuf, Shawn Matthias, Roman Polak, Nick Spaling, James Reimer, and Daniel Winnik have all been traded away in February by a Leafs management group that appears to be cleaning house – for real this time. I just hope Leafs general manager Lou Lamoriello is okay… I mean, his arm must be terribly sore from fielding calls.
In light of the true beginning of this ever-so-painful rebuild process, I’ve decided that Leaf fans could use some cheering up – actually a lot of cheering up (we’ve won all of 3 games in 2016 as of March 1). The following, in no particular order, are 8 small gifts that all Leaf fans are bound to enjoy:
- Mitch Marner in beast mode (x2). We’ll soon have the pleasure of gawking at these silky smooth hands in Toronto.
- The Montreal Canadiens (nearly) falling off the face of the Earth.
- This song because: a) the uplifting message, b) those hairstyles in the video are golden, and c) who doesn’t love belting out a classic rock song? Let’s be honest, this song is basically an orgasm for your ears.
- Auston Matthews photoshopped into a Leafs jersey. The 18 year old would look pretty spiffy in blue and white, don’t you think? The Leafs 1st overall draft lottery chances are looking pretty good…
- A friendly reminder to be grateful that our third jerseys don’t look like this:
- The current American Hockey League Eastern Conference standings. The Toronto Marlies are not only sitting at #1 in their conference, but are the top team in the entire league. The future looks bright, my friends.